Nov 27, 2012

To Sheena of 2012 from Chang of 2012

This is a letter that came out as an idea from Anna Possa's blog post. I posted it on my Facebook account and tagged Chang because I know how much she admires Anna. As we talked about it she said I want to do something like this. To Chariss of 2006 from Chariss of 2012. And I said, I would want to do it too! But there are no changes in me. haha And she said why, ill write you a letter! Charis of 2012 to Sheena of 2012. And so this is her letter for me :)

princesses
Me and Chang :)


To: Sheena of 2012,

I know I haven’t been with you most of your years but I’ve been your friend for two or three years, correct me if I’m wrong haha! I think it’s not about how long we’ve been friends/workmate but I think it’s about the bond that we shared through the years that we’ve been together. You shared a lot of inspiring, wonderful, kalog things to me and I love the sound of our laughter. 

When I’m with you I almost feel like you’re my little sister not to mention you’re a year older than me and I’m physically look like a big sister because you have a slim body figure. Hehe. Well, it doesn’t matter as long as we talked about lots and lots of things; we enjoyed singing Charice and Marie Digby’s songs together. We talked about stupid things and most of all how we envious Anna’s life adventure at a very young age. Sssh. 

I love how we have a discussion about life, about books and movies. I miss those silly times we had in Robinson’s fitting room. I know you’re not in the mood that day but I’m happy I made you smile, I’m not sure if you remember it. A lot of times we tend to worry about how absent-minded we are and think on how to improve our memory recollection. But now I know you are improving and I’m so happy for you. You are a strong, smart, cute, loving and passionate woman. You never limit yourself and love to explore new things. I know how hard worker you are and you stand what you feel is right, a fighter and you open a lot of things to make things work easier. Your soul is one of a kind.
You have a bold character that’s why I adore you so much, you tend not to worry much about the future. You enjoy the present and each moment as it comes. Sometimes you are weird but you are gorgeous and wonderful inside and out. You are also the greatest person I ever met. Childish and kalog like me. I know God will answer your prayers no matter how too small they are. Sometimes they may not be in our own timing or the way we expected it but He knows the best interest of your heart. You are a true warrior and servant of God. I know He will bless your pure heart. 

PS. We will go to Verona no matter what happen and we will stroke Juliet’s boobs.hehe 

Lovelots, 
Chariss of 2012


Aw Chang, thank you!!! You have no idea how much i was touched by your letter(Nagmelt jd akong heart). And I cried a little. hehe. I am somehow always at my best when i am with you because you have such a good heart. My life is so much better because i have a friend like you. Soul sisters. And yes to Verona we shall go :)


Chang is a wonderful friend of mine and an overall sweet person.  To know more about her, you can check her blog: i-am-fine-and-dandy.

Nov 22, 2012

Read to me Rumi

plow, Rumi

If you don’t plow the earth, it’s going to get so hard nothing grows in it. You just plow the earth of yourself. You just get moving. And even don’t ask exactly what’s going to happen. You allow yourself to move around, and you will see the benefit.  -Rumi

Rumi is my favorite poet.

I read a lot of his poems. They are a lot to take in sometimes so you just have to read some lines or stanza's. Even though Rumi is a persian poet and a Sufist, I can relate to him. His poems have been my comfort when the longing for God was too much. 

I discovered that no matter what religion you have there is just this longing in your heart for something to satisfy you. It's what St. Augustine was talking about when he said that my heart is restless until it rest in thee. It's what the psalmist was talking about when he said as the deer pants for the water so my soul longs after you. This longing for God to satisfy me- it was at this time in my life when I found Rumi. I found him when I could barely understand or express myself. I was so Restless. And then I read this:

“What you seek is seeking you.”

This just blows my mind. I could not believe that it is God who is seeking me that is why I'm seeking him. I learned to relax after that. 

I didn't come here of my own accord, and I can't leave that way.
Whoever brought me here, will have to take me home.


I have this feeling that no matter what I'll do or how grievous my sins are if only i will call, God will take me home. 

“Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again , come , come.” 

 Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. - This is my motto every time i fall into sin. It has become perhaps my life's motto I'm afraid. Do not be afraid to come yet again. Bagag leps, is what we call in our dialect. Translates roughly to thick face/lips which means no shame. I'm naturally shy but with God I try as much to be bold. I just hope I'm not abusing his kindness.

Do you feel that sometimes? That maybe perhaps you take everything lightly like forgiveness? It is indeed my prayer that my heart be sincere towards God.

“That which God said to the rose, and caused it to laugh in full-blown beauty, He said to my heart, and made it a hundred times more beautiful.” 

In Rumi's words i found how beautiful it is to look at the world with such eyes. To express it in that way is just beautiful.

“And still, after all this time, the Sun has never said to the Earth,
"You owe me."
Look what happens with love like that.
It lights up the sky.” 


***


Ahhh... If you want to know more about Rumi you can go and listen to this podcast : Transcript for The Ecstatic Faith of Rumi.  

This was really beautiful and mesmerizing. I love how the interviewee was memorizing poems in Persian language(ah the sound of it!) and then translating it to English. 

   "Speak a new language so that the world will be a new world."

And then this:


“There is a secret medicine given only to those who hurt so hard they can't hope.
The hopers would feel slighted if they knew.” 
-Rumi


So don't you worry your pretty little head okay? Be blessed!

Nov 18, 2012

Wisdom talks

Sunrise Philippines :)

Wake up early...
Fight with all you have
I don't want cowards to possess me.
Do not be halfhearted.
When do your task give your all,
When you listen give your attention,
in everything you do give your all.
When you decide stand with all you have.
I want a fighter as my friend.
I will fight with you.
If you want to bring change and transformation in your heart,
you've got to start giving your all.
That is the meaning of dying.
Die to yourself so you may gain me.
Die. Die.
Dying hurts but when the intention is to gain me
it will be nothing compared to what you will gain in the end.
So start now.
Start anew with every moment.
Die everyday!
But as for you, die every moment.
When your heart aches,
die with your pride.
Die for me.
Die for me...

We have a lot of work to do,
we must begin early.
In the morning you will find me.
Call and talk to me.
I will help you.
Your intention is to gain me
and only through dying shall i be possessed by you.
Your reward is in everything the Bible says.
And above all,
God's constant presence will overshadow you
and make you holy.
And you shall delight in rich fare 
as you will be his friend and constant companion.
So I say die to yourself and let us begin.

-tabulyogang



Nov 15, 2012

Dear Childhood Friends

Camiguin




I wish I could write what is in my heart now. Convey in written words the solitude I feel while looking at the ocean.

The people in our island do not talk about these things. They just are.

 The mountains and the sea are a part of them. Their talk and their easy way of taking life in is a proof. There is no hurry; even vehicles take their time, moving like turtles in one lane road. And yes, the entire road has already been cemented. You could not see "Men at work" or "Under construction” signs anymore.

Technology has reached our island yet it has not made life fast paced.

The only thing I notice now is that children don’t play outside with the moon anymore. They don’t play the games we used to play; the patentero, the tago-tagoan, the slipper games and the campfires!

They don’t go to the sea when it is low tide and full moon. We used to go and make bonfires. We talk and scare each other with horror stories we heard from people older than us.

In the sea with the fire burning we sit circle on our chosen rocks and stones. We feel that what we were doing was sacred though we did not realize it then. The moment was ours and our soul was one. We love feeling each other's presence in the night. Our faces lightened by the moon. We were beautiful and we don’t know it. And the sea loved us. 

The dark and the white reflection of the moon in the horizon is a shining sword. We were anointed. The breeze and the sound of the shore, they gave their blessings to us.

I love us and how we were as children. We talk about anything. We don’t think about the future. We imagine. We could not turn back time but I wish now that we could still imagine like we used to do it way back then under the moon. And the sunsets! The many sunsets! I wish we could look at life as we look at sunsets - we know that the day has been beautiful.

Wherever you are, I wish we could all meet again under the moon and talk and tell stories of our wanderings and say that it has been good, it has really been good.


 -Gang2(tabulyogang)

Nov 11, 2012

Labor of love and some art

I spent my whole day yesterday working on this!
This needed patching...
patching
haha. I know it's huge and odd...errr ugly? haha but that is what you call effort :p
At least we can now use it.
wood from malaysia
I told my brother to model for me and asked for a smile. This is what i got.
oh o. haha

I took some picture of my water color paintings too. ahaha im in the mood for pictures.
This is the view outside my window...I have no idea how to finish this one. I don't know how to paint the sky. Or what colors to use.
water color
This one, i was trying to copy the picture of my friend with her baby because her picture with her baby babot looked so peaceful and beautiful and so full of love. I'm afraid i made her look like a Japanese father. haha.
water colour
And i will leave you with a poem i wrote and I wish you to never be afraid because I am afraid. And it aint easy. hehe. <Use me as an instrument and let me know that I am being used and that would be life worth living.>

Here i am standing at the entry gate
I am opening my life to a sense of awe and wonder
I am opening my curiosity 
Nothing scares me
I am curios of what creativity 
I will manifest even amidst obstacles
Nothing scares me
Yes nothing does.
-t


Can u sense the struggle
the cry of the moment?
USE me
use me...


Nov 8, 2012

For You Are My Strong Tower

THe Lord is my tower
Excuse my childish drawing :)

I do feel lost many times
And in my lost times i call upon you
For I have no one to call on to.

You don't always seem to answer
But I know you listen
I know you hear
I know even before I call
You knew I'd call.

You know me,
You know me,
You know me,
Yes you do.
And that is all
I need to know.

-tabulyogang
 
Images by Freepik